File 030823
Email with Forwarded Joke About American History Quotes (File 030823)
Internal Deutsche Bank email from Steven Elkman forwarding a humorous anecdote about a Japanese exchange student answering American history questions, featuring satirical attributions of modern political figures' quotes.
Summary
Steven Elkman at Deutsche Bank forwards an email containing a lighthearted joke about a classroom scenario where a bright foreign exchange student named 'Little Hodiaki' from Japan correctly answers American history questions. The joke uses satire to attribute controversial or crude statements to various public figures, including George Bush (1991), Bill Clinton and Monica Lewinsky (1997), Michael Jackson (2004), and collectively to 'the American people' (2008). The email includes standard Deutsche Bank confidentiality disclaimers and appears to be internal office humor circulated among colleagues.
From: Steven ElkmanSent: 11/23/2011 5:29:30 PMSubject: Fw: Little Hodiaki [I]Classification: For internal use onlySteven Munro ElkmanClient AdvisorManaging DirectorDeutsche Bank Alex. BrownA Division of Deutsche Bank Securities, Inc.280 Park Avenue, 3 EastNew York, NY 10017phonefaxSubject: Little HodiakiThe teacher said, "Let's begin by reviewing some American History.Who said 'Give me Liberty, or give me Death'?"She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Little Hodiaki a bright foreignexchange student from Japan, who had his hand up:'Patrick Henry, 1775'she said..'Very good!'Who said, 'Government of the People, by the People, for the People, shallnot perish from the Earth?'Again, no response except from Little Hodiaki, 'Abraham Lincoln, 1863'..'Excellent!', said the teacher continuing, 'let's try one a bit More difficult.:Who said, 'Ask not what your country can do for you, but what you can do for your country?'Once again, Hodiaki's was the only hand in the air and he said;'John F. Kennedy, 1961'.The teacher snapped at the class, 'Class, you should be ashamed of yourselves, Little Hodiaki isn't from thiscountry and he knows more about our history than you do.'She heard a loud whisper: fuck the Japs,''Who said that? I want to know right now!' she angrily demanded.Little Hodiaki put his hand up, 'General MacArthur, 1945.'At that point, a student in the back said, 'I'm gonna puke.'The teacher glares around and asks, 'All right!!! Now who said that!?'HOUSE OVERSIGHT 030823Again, Little Hodiaki says, 'George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister,1991.'Now furious, another student yells, 'Oh yeah? Suck this!'Little Hodiaki jumps out of his chair waving his hand and shouts to the teacher,'Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!'Now with almost mob hysteria someone said, 'You little shit. If you say anything else, I'll kill you.'Little Hodiaki frantically yells at the top of his voice,'Michael Jackson to the child witnesses testifying againsthim, 2004.'The teacher fainted.As the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said,'Oh shit, We're screwed!'Little Hodiaki said quietly, 'the American people, November 4, 2008.Regards,jac0www.carbonacapital.comThis communication may contain confidential and/or privileged information.If you are not the intended recipient (or have received this communicationin error) please notify the sender immediately and destroy thiscommunication. Any unauthorized copying, disclosure or distribution of thematerial in this communication is strictly forbidden.Deutsche Bank does not render legal or tax advice, and the informationcontained in this communication should not be regarded as such.HOUSE OVERSIGHT 030824